(My apologies to my male readers... you can just go ahead and skip this fashion-woe related post altogether.)

(Oh, and in case you missed it yesterday, please go say hi and feel free to ask me a question on this post.)

I've desperately needed a new pair of jeans for a while now. I have two pairs that I wear on a regular basis -- one that fits well in the waist and butt, but is too tight in the hips/thighs, which sort of pulls them down a bit as I walk around in them, and another that fits well in the hips/thighs, but is too big in the waist and saggy in the rear. If I could magically fuse these two pairs of jeans together, I'd have a pair that fits perfectly. (Or one that fits terribly, depending on how you combine them.)

I'd heard a lot of good things about the new jeans from Gap. Lots of people have had these Gap Born to Fit parties and done reviews of their new line of jeans. It seemed like a lot of women out there complained about the same things I do when trying to find a pair of jeans, namely that we're actually shaped like women. Last week, my friend Carolyn sent me a link to a 30% off coupon for Gap, so I decided that this weekend, I'd head to the mall and try on a pair... or twelve.

I knew that I definitely was not going to try on the Always Skinny jeans. Sorry, but the slim/tapered leg look just looks silly on me (what with the hips and all!), like I'm mis-proportioned. I grabbed a pair of Perfect Boot and Sexy Boot jeans in the two sizes I'm usually between, in two different washes each. I figured the Perfect Boot would work best for me because I typically don't love low-rise jeans, but I actually preferred the Sexy Boot. The rise of the Perfect Boot just hit me at a funny spot and wasn't comfortable. (See, I have this problem where I hate the feeling of having a muffin top when you sit down, even though totally normal and just gravity and even skinny girls get that little pooch. But I have this issue with clothes touching me "funny" -- I actually complain about feeling clothes touch me. Yeah...)

Anyway, so I decided the Sexy Boot was okay, but not great... still tighter in the thighs than I'd like (I guess that's what "slim in the hip and thigh" means), slightly more fitted in the waist than I usually prefer (see problem above), but it made my butt look fantastic. So, I figured I'd hold onto a pair of those and try on a couple more styles. (Oh, and the different washes fit me differently too... I could barely button up the dark wash, but the medium wash was fine.)

Next stop, the Curvy jean, which in theory sounds perfect: low waist, curvy in the hip and thigh. Ummm... these fit even tighter in the hip and thigh area than both the Boot jeans. Seriously? Curvy implies to me that it should, oh I don't know, fit a woman with curves. No? But, it fit okay and there was a coupon, and I really needed jeans and I couldn't make a decision then between Sexy Boot and Curvy, so I decided to buy both and return the one I didn't like later.

I was headed to the checkout when I realized there was another whole display of jeans in another aisle. The Boyfriend jean. They have what is described as a "slouchy fit." Apparently, my thighs and hips must be slouchy, because these fit perfectly. They were immediately super comfortable.

I had grabbed the "distressed" pair to try on and loved them so much, I decided I definitely had to get a pair. The only problem? The ridiculous whiskering that Gap does to their distressed wash jeans. I mean, seriously, there were basically bright-white lines pointing at unmentionable areas. NOT COOL. But the jeans, they fit so well! So I went back to the display and grabbed a pair of "destructed" jeans... they didn't have those ridiculous white lines, but they have all that fake wear and tear on them. Not typically my style, but I bought them anyway and decided I'd get Adam's opinion on whether they looked good or inappropriate.

I got home, put on a fashion show with my three pairs of jeans, and decided to return the Curvy, keep the destructed Boyfriend jeans (although I am still getting used to the style, Adam tells me they look great), and temporarily keep the Sexy Boot with the hope that I can break them in wearing them a little bit at a time around the house with the tags on, because then I think they will fit perfectly. Since they were 30% off, I might as well keep them with the tags on for a couple weeks and then just return them later if I don't end up liking the fit. (And, honestly, I fit into them just fine if I was a normal person, but like I said... I don't like my clothes touching me. You know, fitting properly.)

Such a freaking ordeal, just to buy a pair of jeans. It's so frustrating that the only pair that I really will wear on a regular basis after all this (unless I manage to fit into the Sexy Boot) is a destructed pair. Why can't they make jeans that fit in the waist, AND the hips and thighs, AND don't sag in the butt, that have a regular dark wash? How freaking hard is that? Why is it that I have to settle for close enough? I can't possibly be the only woman out there whose thighs are bigger than her waist, can I? I mean, that just isn't how nature intended us... we got them birthin' hips.

Oh, and what is with the inconsistent sizing, even within brands? The Sexy Boot jeans, which are slightly snug, are a size larger than the Boyfriend jean that are looser, and they both even include "actual" waist-sizing on the labels. How is that possible? Why don't they just make waist sizing consistent both within a brand and across brands? I know it's possible... they do it for men!

Posted by: Kowala1000 | November 20, 2009 10:27 AM